July 30, 2011: Yep, I'm Still a Compulsive Eater

Yesterday's food:

God time? No

Exercise? Yes (swim)

Points: 30/36

[P] Hot dog

[P] Hot dog

[V] Brussels sprouts

[V] X

[V or F] Banana

[F] Blueberries

[F] Blueberries
[F] Raspberries

[St] Kashi

[St] Pizza (Lean Cuisine)

[D] Skim milk

[D] Skim milk

[Sn] Skinny Cow Dreamy Clusters

[Sn] Fudgesicles
[Sn] Fudgesicles
[Sn] Fudgesicles

[Nightfood bar] Yes

[W] One cup
Poundage lost: 7.4

Yep, I'm still a compulsive eater. I see it in how I handle the Fudgesicles. They're safe both for my diet and for my non-sugar intake, but I interact with them just like I interact with anything made of sugar: I eat it quickly, mindlessly, and compulsively. So, the behavior is still there; only the object is different. So far I'm OK with that, but it does disquiet the back of my mind to know that compulsive eating is still a part of my makeup. I guess I thought (apparently in some alternate universe) that I or God would be able to cure that part of me, although I know that as with any other addiction, compulsive eating can only be arrested. I wish I could fine it or give it a ticket, too, LOL :-) However, as long as I compulsively eat something safe that doesn't trigger me to eat more and more of it, like those dreamy crunchy Klondike bars do, or to eat other stuff that's bad for me, I can live with that.

I kind of coasted through the announcement yesterday that I started another blog: Fleurs-de-Lisa. I'm actually really excited about it, although my primary commitment still remains here :-) It will be hard to keep that balance, but this blog is more than half way done, so I think I can do both. Who knows? Maybe I'll keep going with this one, but I doubt it. I struggle with having fun in my life, so the beauty blog will give  me a huge dose of that. I haven't even really gone "live" yet, and I have 16 followers who believe in me enough, and who want to support me enough, that they've signed up "blind." Please, Lord, help me deliver a fun and informative beauty blog! I get to be shallow on-line! How fun is that? But, really, I shouldn't put myself down. It's a valid hobby, maybe even more so than hobbies where people just collect stuff but never use it.

BTW, I added a gluten-free recipe to my recipe tab: Rice Krispie-Coated Chicken Tenders :-) Hope you like them.

July 30, 2011: New Woot-y Things!

Thursday's food:

God time? No

Exercise?Yes (PT exercises)

Points: 36 of 36

[P] Pork

[P] Feta cheese (from salad)

[V] Large salad

[V] Large salad

[V or F] Blueberries

[F] Apple

[F] Blueberries

[St] Kashi

[St] Brown rice

[D] Feta cheese

[D] Yogurt

[D] Skim milk

[D] Skim milk

[Sn] Fudgesicles (x 2)

[Sn] Fudgesicles (x 2)

[Nightfood bar] Yes

[W] Four cups

Zipity-doo-dah! Yep, I'm totally corn-pone when I'm kookie happy. I'm really liking my life right now and am spending a lot of time thanking and praising the Lord for helping me turn my life around. I'm really excited about the two spiritual groups I'm starting at church: the recovery Bible study and the Al-Anon group. I'm super-psyched that I'm on a roll with physical exercise multiple times a week (swimming and physical therapy), often with my good friend Thea for company. I have so much work coming in that I'm thinking of hiring someone to help me. And I'm really happy that I now have a "safe" eating plan in Weight Watchers. It's like a food compass that I can always come back to when I get off track, and my Chew gets the best of me. Ive decided to start a beauty blog after all, which should be a lot of fun. My family relationships are good after being bad for such a long time (forgiveness and amends-making has worked wonders), and I am truly happy to be in my own skin at this time in my life, i..e, my 50s!

None of it would have come true without the help of God and Jesus and my willingness to do the "legwork." It dawned on me the other day that I consider God to be a Magic-8 Ball or a genie in a bottle. I pray and pray (and wish and wish) for my prayers to be answered, and then -- later -- I catch up to the fact that I have to put one foot in front of the other, often walking blindly, and step out in faith, trusting that my Higher Power is walking in front of me, opening the doors that I'm supposed to walk through!

What doors are you walking through right now? I'd love to know!

July 28, 2011: OMG! I'm Such a Slob!

Don't forget to enter the Nightfood 1-year supply giveaway! Only a few days left!

You may now whip me with a thousand wet noodles for not blogging in the past 11 days (give or take). I. am. such. a. slob. I've always been bad at letter-writing, and sometimes blogging feels like I'm writing one long letter that rarely gets answered. I KNOW you're out there (I check my stats every so often), so suck it up and write me a danged comment already! Heh-heh. Was that enough of a hissy fit for you? It would be a lot more interesting to blog if I knew somebody was reading (hint, hint).

No food today, but please know that I have been tracking my points, and I've sworn off the "cold, crunchy chocolate shell" of the Klondike bars, even if they are low in points. I found a substitute (sugar-free Fudgesicles) that are only 1 point each, so they have been my "guilty pleasure" for the past 11 days since I last wrote. They remind me, in an innocuous and safe way, that my inner Chew is ever ready to leap out and devour everything that isn't nailed down. However, the sugar-free Fudgesicles don't trigger my Chew like the Klondike bars did. I've also lost 1 pound of the 2.1 pounds I regained after July 4th. Hopefully my Weight Watchers weigh-in on Saturday will show more results because I've been swimming hard this week and not using the points :-)

OK, I'm going to let my superficial, pop-culture self out and say I'm going to close early so I can watch the start of this season's Project Runway, including a pre-show on the selection process and that I am going to start my own beauty blog (cosmetic beauty, that is) after all. I didn't think I wanted to write two blogs at the same time, but I've (pretty much) had a good time guest reviewing (only one annoying experience out of the bunch), so I'm going to give it a try :-) I'm thinking of naming it "Fleurs-de-Lisa." What do you think?

Don't forget to enter the Nightfood 1-year supply giveaway! Only a few days left!